Whilst that’s a possible explanation, correlation does not imply causation. There are many other potential contributing factors (increased loneliness, economic hardship, acceptability of suicide, changes to how deaths by misadventure vs suicide are recorded, etc) and more research will be needed to identify which, if any, played a role in the observed change.

Nobody is asking for it, but that’s not the purpose: the purpose is to stir up opposition.

I suspect a significant portion of the population will be indifferent to the proposal. At best, they’ll shrug and say, ‘Sure, makes sense if that’s what’s needed,’ without bothering to think it through fully.

More liberally minded people react with justified opposition to the proposal. At that point, the Conservatives will rally the indifferent against ‘the woke’. They hope to gain support by convincing people they have a common enemy.

“Labour’s slightly left of me, Reform is to the right, here I am, stuck right of middle I’m screwed.” - Rishi Sunak, probably.

“Right lads, 'eres the job: £134k bars of the finest, ripe for the taking.”

“£134k? Weight’s gonna be a problem. That Luton crew got done last year overloading with £90k of Yorkies.”

“Not a problem 'ere, lad, know what I’m saying?”

“… … … Buenos? Son of a bitch, I’m in.”

It’s only erased £85b when you consider the £300m we’re saving every week /s

Tonight on Whose Fault is it Anyway?..

“I have never shied away from tough decision. Our choices over the last week, opposed by the party opposite, will prove to be the right ones. Many experts are already predicting a golden future, with up to one million new homes built, and a new trade route to Japan.”

**Camera cuts to the swathe of destruction left by Godzilla**

BoJo’s dough bros

BP should just scrape down the Tory benches in Parliament. Plenty of grease and oil there.

Must feel odd, as a stripper, to encourage people to slip portraits of your mum into your pants.

“Hi there! The name’s Clippy, James Clippy. Looks like you’re trying to take over the world. Do you need any help with that?”