

I’ve been both a line employee and a manager. My answer depends on the situation.
I worked “everything except manager” in a restaurant that sold beer by the pitcher. There’s a local law that says you can’t sell “floaters” (a pitcher of beer with a cup of ice floating in it). Most customers who wanted one were capable of asking for a cup of ice like an adult so they could assemble it themselves if they wanted. This one guy got hot as hell about it. I told him, sternly, that it was illegal for me to serve him a floater but I’d happily bring him a cup of ice and what he did with it after I dropped it off was his business as far as I was concerned.
That shut him up. He left a tip of like … 37 cents or some shit so I paid to wait his table that night. That was as much as I was ever going to get out of him so I figured I did alright there.
With things that weren’t against the law, I’d tell them sweet as can be “That’s against our rules but I’ll go ask my manager to see if I can make an exception.” You can imagine for yourself how often I bothered actually talking to a manager and how often I did or didn’t get or grant an exception. If it actually mattered, I would ask a manager. If an American customer doesn’t like your answer, they’ll demand to speak to the manager anyway. Telling a customer no before having a manager tell you to do it anyway just invites more of the same. They’ll behave even more outrageously next time you see them.
Typically, your manager in a restaurant or retail location has only a fraction more power than you do.
As someone who has managed an in-house support team, if an internal customer is rude, cruel, or demanding to one of my employees or contractors, I won’t put up with it. I can and have, politely and firmly, told them they need to behave professionally. I’ll happily tell them that we’re not the ones who set the rules but we are responsible and accountable if we break them. And I will use my political power to make sure they regret it if they press on.
It sounds like your other, more experienced team member has decided that it probably doesn’t matter. Not being a 'Strayan, I can’t say whether they’re right or not. In an American context (outside of California anyway), I’d probably make the same call. After “checking with the manager.” 😉
bigclivedotcom - I have no idea what he’s talking about 90% of the time but he’s generally a relaxing watch.
Ali Spagnola and Aging Wheels aren’t quite what you’re describing in terms of being calm and chill but I still love their stuff.
Seconding others’ recommendations for Technology Connections, TheCrafsMan, Cathode Ray Dude, and Techmoan.